A new study published in the Journal of Sex Research is pushing back against one of the most persistent stereotypes about growing older: that the desire for sex and romance fades with age. The research found that adults between 60 and 80 not only remain interested in sexual intimacy but consider it a fundamental part of any romantic relationship.
Researchers interviewed 100 single adults — 50 men and 50 women — ranging in age from 60 to 83. The results were striking. Almost three-quarters of participants said they would not want to be in a relationship that didn't include sexual activity, according to Healthline. Many used the phrase "deal breaker" to describe the absence of intimacy. One 68-year-old participant, Dean, put it bluntly: "If you don't want to have sex, then what's the use of having a relationship? You can be friends without having sex."
About 30 participants said they might be open to a sexless romantic relationship, but their responses often came with significant caveats or contradictions, suggesting the desire for physical connection remained strong even when flexibility was expressed.
Experts not involved in the study emphasized that while desire persists, physical challenges can complicate matters. "Adults don't become more asexual as they age; however, they may become less sexual, even though the desire for intimacy remains strong," said Karyne Wilner, a licensed psychologist. Arien Muzacz, a clinical associate professor at Oregon State University, noted that older adults who remain sexually active report greater overall well-being and life satisfaction.
The findings carry practical implications for healthcare providers and families alike. Open conversations about sexual health with older adults are often avoided due to discomfort or assumptions. This research suggests those conversations are not only welcome but necessary — and that dismissing the romantic and sexual needs of older people does them a real disservice.
